I'm feeling much better now, although still irritable and tired. I don't plan to go to bed any earlier tonight. Anyway, I've heard that sleep deprivation can cause temporary euphoria. I haven't experienced anything of the sort yet, but maybe I might if I continue the way I am. I'm sleeping fine, it's just that I wake up so early in the mornings. I find that it varies between 4 or 5am. I'm not entirely sure if this is the natural time that my body wakes up, or if I'm being woken up by some inconsiderate person's noise. My next door neighbours have a dog, so it could be them and the people across the road are always noisy. My dad also wakes up early like me, so perhaps it's him. He's sleeping downstairs at the moment with my mum. We have a bed in our living room so that my mum can lay there in comfort when she's feeling poorly. She'll only get more poorly now because we think that he cancer has spread. The doctors have found another 'mass', but with the information that we already know, it's almost certain that it is more cancer. This means that she'll have to have the full blown chemotherapy treatment. I'm taking it all well so far, but I guess that's because I'm tough. Anyway, enough of that.

I'm having a Chinese takeaway for dinner tonight. I think dad felt sorry for me because I'd had such a crappy day at school. This is not technically true, just the last hour and 20 minutes of the day. I don't know what happened to be honest. I was having an alright day and then I had a great lunchtime, but during science I just didn't feel that great. I just felt really run down and tired. I had to do a test today as well, but I didn't very good in it. I only got 12/20, which is a terrible 60%. To be honest I didn't really understand any of the topic that we'd been studying. It was all about chemical equations, atoms and ionic bonding etc. I think it was the fact that a lot of it was related to maths. I've been offered the chance to move up into the top set, which if great news. I might actually learn something now, especially if I go to the after school classes too. I didn't go to the last one because I couldn't be bothered. I didn't really have any excuses not to go, I just didn't feel up to it. I didn't want to sit all on my own either.

I just got told off for swearing, but my dad knows damn well that I wasn't swearing at him. It's not like I give a shit what he thinks of me. It's his fault that I am the way I am because he's the one that brought me up, along with my mum of course, but it's not as if she ever did much of it. So what if I swear? Sometimes it just comes out when I'm annoyed. He doesn't know half the stuff that I talk about when I'm with my friends, nor do I wish to tell him. I am my own person and he has to accept that. I accept things about him that I shouldn't have to accept, but there's no need to go into that.

I got a D in my citizenship test today. I suppose that a D is a great accomplishment to some people, but not to me. Some of the stuff I wrote was really offensive and it wasn't relevant to the question at all, but who cares? Citizenship is only worth half a GCSE after 2 years of work. I want to try and stick to the rules, but why should I be forced into writing something that I don't believe in? I think that it's wrong, but that's just my school for you. I suppose that my opinions "aren't on the curriculum"? My teacher took me aside and spoke to me, but I already knew what she was going to say. I know I have to stick to the rules, but I find it so hard to.

This has taken me over and hour to write so far because I had to stop to go and eat my dinner. I'm sure that the Chinese would frown upon this sort of food and call it disgraceful, but there you go. These companies are only trying to make money for themselves, and I don't blame them. I mean, I would. Perhaps Chinese people find it offensive that this greasy MSG coated food is named after them. I suppose it is a bit annoying really considering that real Chinese food is nothing like this.

I have been invited to go into town tomorrow, but I don't intend to go. I really can't be bothered to go. I'm too tired for one, and I'm not in the mood to go faffing about with all my friends. Neither do I wish to be photographed, so it's probably for the best that I stay home tomorrow. I need to finish my business coursework too, but I can't see that happening. I want to catch up on what I missed out on Wednesday, but I can't.