If you can't do it for yourself, then please do it for me. Hopefully the person that this is directed at actually reads it. The reason my mum is dying is because she didn't go to the doctors. They'll be able to tell you whether it's just become habit or whether you have an illness. I'm sorry I turned my phone off, but I just couldn't deal with you. I have so much shit to deal with already and I'm sorry, but what do you want me to say? I just don't know. I can't make you do anything and you know that. As much as I want to make it all better, I can't. You've got to get help from someone who knows what they're talking about. Unfortunately, that's not me. :(

As much as I've tried to forget about you, I just can't. Today made me realise that I haven't forgotten at all.

I'm not going to write anymore. I can't.