Well, nobody seems to read my blog anymore, but nevermind. At least it gives me something to do when I'm bored and I can talk about things to get them out of my stystem.



I've been to Peterborough today with my dad. It was a long and tiring day, but I still had a good time. It's nice to get out of the house for once. We went into almost all the shops there (which is a lot). I didn't buy any clothes, so I'm a bit dissapointed about that. I felt awkward going in all the clothes shops on my own. That's just something I'll have to get used to because my mum sure as hell can't take me anymore and none of my friends are particularly interested in clothes shopping for me. I just don't know what clothes look nice on me and I have no idea what half of the stuff is either. Everybody wants to look nice and I don't. I'd like to, but it seems impossible right now. I need my hair cut too, but I don't want to go into the hairdressers on my own. It's so lonely and boring. I know for a fact I'll go in there and ask for a trim again even though I want my hair cut short. There are lots of things that I'd like to do, but I can't. I go shopping alone quite a lot now and it makes me feel sad. I usually get followed around like I'm some sort of shoplifter and I feel uncomfortable. I've never stolen anything in my life and I never will do because it's wrong and that's not me. I don't like being treated like a dishonest person because I'm really not that at all. I hate liars.



I think I'm getting a bit fat again. I'm just over average for my height, so not overweight as such. It's so depressing that I can't find any clothes that fit me comfortably. I'd love to be a size 8-10, but I'm a 12 and it sucks. I know that this is a 'normal' size to be, but I'm not happy with it. The next problem I've come across is that I would never 'diet' or exercise. This means that I can't possibly lose weight. I'd love not to feel tired all the time and I'd love to be healthy, but I don't know how to change what I eat. This whole psychological food problem is fucking pathetic, but I need to start eating properly because it's making me ill. If I'm this unfit now, then I can only imagine how bad it's going to get in the future. I'm in the critical stages of development and I've already fucked it up.



Anyway, I bought that GTA game for my Nintendo DS. The weird China Town one about all the Triad gangster blokes. It's funny because they all have names like 'Ling' and 'Huang'. I'm pretty good at driving the car, but I spent about $4000 on cocaine so now I have no money to buy the weed that I need for the next mission. It was something to do with Rastafarians. I keep getting emails from the AmmuNation company on his phone and I'm like "fuck off you wankers" because it's so goddamn annoying. I also bought 5 DVDs and season 8 of X-Files which I'VE WAITED FUCKING MONTHS TO GET.

With that, I leave you.